Buy Cars and Trucks in Berkeley, Missouri

Audi : R8 Cpe Auto 2012 AUDI R8 2dr Cpe Auto quattro 5.2L GT
Audi : R8 Cpe Auto 2012 AUDI R8 2dr Cpe Auto quattro 5.2L GT
$95,655.00 (15 Bids)
Time Left: 1h 52m
Audi : R8 Cpe Man 2008 AUDI R8 2dr Cpe Man quattro
Audi : R8 Cpe Man 2008 AUDI R8 2dr Cpe Man quattro
$44,544.44
$89,950.00
Time Left: 1h 52m
Ferrari : Other Sdn EcoSport 2012 FISKER Karma 4dr Sdn EcoSport
Ferrari : Other Sdn EcoSport 2012 FISKER Karma 4dr Sdn EcoSport
$50,100.00
$120,000.00
Time Left: 1h 59m
GMC : Sonoma Lowrider Pickup Flashy Low Miles Great MPG
GMC : Sonoma Lowrider Pickup Flashy Low Miles Great MPG
$2,850.00
$5,000.00
Time Left: 11h 16m

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Questions Related to berkeley, missouri cars

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Just to solidify my story: What do you think? Please critique?
Question:
Ok I'm almost done with my story. I've got the outline done, most of the details planned out, and I've got the title picked out. Now I just want to know what you think: The story takes place in Kansas City, Missouri in the late 90s. Dets. Valerie Dane and James Macall are given the case of Summer Aiken, a 17-year-old mom to a 2-year-old daughter, Sydney. Summer was found in an alley, apparently gang-raped and beaten to death. While gathering information involving the case, Summer confides in the detectives that she knows that she doesn’t have much time left and that the treatments that they’re trying aren’t working. All she wants is to see her daughter. When they go to Summer’s apartment to get Sydney from the babysitter, the babysitter is gone and so is Sydney. The case goes from rape and assault to kidnapping. When they go to Leah Aiken’s home it is discovered the entire story of how her family fell apart. Leah says that she would do anything to make Sydney’s life better. This, therefore, makes her a suspect. Next, they approach Sydney’s father, Ashton Berkeley, who is 18. He tells them that he wanted to be with Sydney, but his parents banned him from having any contact with Summer or his daughter. He wanted to take Sydney away from Summer because he heard about her being a prostitute and thought Summer was a bad parent. This also makes him a suspect in the kidnapping of Sydney. The detectives eventually find Sydney in the basement of a brownstone after an anonymous tip heard Sydney screaming. The babysitter is found dead with Sydney. The basement belonged to Dallas Campbell, the man that led the gang-rape of Summer. He did this because he claims that Summer cheated him out of money because she wasn't "good enough".Unfortunately, while Dallas is on trial, Summer dies of severe blood loss from the internal bleeding and multiple staff infections from the cuts she got. But she did get to spend time with her daughter, in which time she learns the word “momma”. After Summer’s passing, Ashton is awarded custody of Sydney and has his name put on Sydney’s birth certificate as her father. During this whole story, Valerie and James confront their physical and emotional attraction. Although James loves Valerie and would do anything for her, he’s not ready to let go of his deceased wife, Rachel, who died in a car accident involving a drunk driver. In the end, James learns to let go and live with the fact that his wife passed away and that she would want him to be happy with someone. The epilogue reveals that Valerie Dane was telling the story in present day to a group of new detectives as she's retiring. Please critique me. I'm tough skinned. I can handle it. hahaha Leah is Summer's mother. Sorry for not pointing that out. Once I get into a story I write without thinking sometimes. bahaha


Answer:
Pretty good, it's probably something I would read if I saw it in a bookstore. Just wanted to point out something: at the end of the first paragraph you mention a Leah Aiken. Was this maybe an early name for Summer, or another character altogether? If it's another character you should probably specify exactly who she is. I'm guessing it's just a name mix-up, though. I've done that before (the heroine of my current story has had her name changed four times). But overall, very good!