Buy Cars and Trucks in Oak Forest, Illinois

Audi : A5 2.0L Premium 2010 Black A5!
Audi : A5 2.0L Premium 2010 Black A5!
$23,100.00 (3 Bids)
Time Left: 4h 34m
Ford : F-250 1999 FORD F250 XL 4X4 W  WESTERN PLOW "
Ford : F-250 1999 FORD F250 XL 4X4 W WESTERN PLOW "
$3,000.00 (0 Bids)
Time Left: 4h 50m
Nissan : 370Z Touring 2010 Silver 370Z!
Nissan : 370Z Touring 2010 Silver 370Z!
$20,000.00 (3 Bids)
Time Left: 4h 51m

Sponsored Links


Questions Related to oak, forest cars

Provided By Y! Answers

Living in Oak Park vs. Downtown Chicago?
Question:
I've just graduated college and am looking to get an apartment. Seeing as I went to college in River Forest, I know the Oak Park area pretty well, so I'd be comfortable living there, I think. I got a job (a career job) on Michigan Ave. So if I lived in Oak Park I could take the green line to work (I don't have a car). At the same time, a lot of people have been telling me to look downtown either on the North Side or in the Loop area. Now I'm trying to make a pro/con list for Oak Park vs. Chicago, and if I do live in Chicago, what neighborhood to live in. I would love some input! A little more about me. I was raised in the western suburbs, I'm planning on living alone, I need to be able to live my life without a car.


Answer:
Well, I grew up in Oak Park (still am) and I say try Oak Park. Everyone I know who lived in the city moved because of familial reasons (like starting a family.) But if you're young, just stay in the city... Oak Park's pretty boring anyways.

how can i start my next paragraph as im just about to enter the forest?
Question:
Friday the thirteenth Friday the thirteenth i have been dreading this day for the last month now, getting up early in the morning just to go camping. I hate going I wish I could just disappear for the next weekend Unfortunately I have to go. 7:00 I realised I should try and drag myself out of my bed and get packing for the Worse weekend upon me. I rolled out of the bed and landed on the cold, hard floor, Dragging the tattered suit case out of the cupboard and dumping all my clothes inside the suit case, I strolled to the bathroom to get ready for the trip. Then, I dragged my threadbare suit case down the gloomy stair case, making my way to the car. Slinging the suit case in the back of the car, I jumped in. The back of the car was waiting for the long journey ahead of me. The shabby car was finally ready to set off, barely able to hold together with the exhaust choking every so often. I can't take this! My head aches from the hellish car fumes, and the only thing worthwhile in the trip, the beautiful surroundings, are covered behind a thick layer of exhaust. I can make out that we're getting closer to the Big Oak Tree, with all the wild life dashing through the forest. As much as it was depressing, it was also relieving to think every second that goes by is one less that I have to put up with Friday the 13th. The car comes to a steady stop. There is the shack, I'll be staying in for the weekend. Dragging myself out of the car to go look in the Shed I placed my hands on the dusty door handle trying to force it open. The door opened. I stepped into the damp shack searching for the light switch, bumping and crashing into small and large objects. I reached up to turn on the light, grabbing it firmly, I then realised that it was not a light switch, it felt slimy and rough. Pulling this thing down to the damp flooring running out of the shack shouting and screaming. This was driving me crazy I couldn't have two whole nights of this. I brought myself round to try and find the light swtich again, making my way back into the shack searching once more feeling around the damp walls. Finally I thought that I had found the switch, pulling the tatty string a light started to flicker on. I glanced around the room to see what was around me, everything was covered by mucky sheets. I could hear something scattering around me. My ears strained as they heard a pitter patter of what seemed to be tiny paws scattering along the mouldy wooden floor. I didn't like this one bit I'd rather sleep outside then in this shack.The door slammed behind me as I made my way out, grabbing my tent and setting of to explore the mysterious forest. Next paragraph.............??????..................................... ......................... what grade do you think i could achive also ? or how could i make this better?


Answer:
umm, this kind of doesn't make sense... sorry, I couldnt follow it at all.

Help!!! Anyone living in Illinois with these Cicadas???
Question:
OK, I live in Oak Forest and we have millions of these things. I opened my pool on Mothers Day weekend and since these devil bugs arrived, I cannot even walk outside. I have not been able to water my flowers, grill or swim. I have to wear a sheet just to get out of the car. If you could hear outside right now you would not believe the noise level. I know they don't hurt so please don't tell me that. I know its an unreasonable fear but I can't shake it. When the hell are they leaving?????


Answer:
Oh I am so sorry! I live in the NW Suburbs and we haven't gotten a single one, THANKFULLY. I'd be just as terrified of them as you are. They are creepy gross little things. Eek. I really feel for you! When they came around 17 years ago, we never got them back then either (I was in the NW burbs then too). Maybe you need to move before the next wave! They live for just over a month, so they are expected to be gone by the 4th of July. That's too long if you ask me, especially since you have so many. While you're stuck in the house, try this game - it's called "Swat the Cicada" :) http://wgntv.trb.com/features/bal-cicadas-flash,0,1699343.fla sh?coll=wgntv-features-utility

I need someone experienced with spirit guides/animal totems... maybe Shamanism? And some time.?
Question:
A few months ago I had a series of 3 dreams, all within one week. It all began one day at college. I went outside in to the empty courtyard.. it was far too cold for many people to be out. Almost as soon as I walked out the door I noticed a Sparrow laying on the ground. Upon farther investigation as I got closer, I realized it was still breathing. I felt a connection to the bird. I stood there... seemingly feeling what it felt... alone and cold. I didn't want this little guy to die by himself, I picked it up and comforted it, which didn't seem to bother it at all. As time went by, I realized I was going to be late for class so I set him down underneath a bush to provide protection from predators but also in the sunlight to provide warmth. Later on, after class. I went back outside to see, what I think, was the same sparrow hopping around. That night I had a dream, unlike any other I've ever had. I awoke in an oak forest.. It seemed to be fall due to the beautiful orange and yellow leaves on the trees that were floating down from the tree tops. I continued walking until I found a turtle. I picked him up and continued walking for an other minute until I came across a small pond. I sat the turtle in the pond and noticed more animals. A frog, a different turtle and a crocodile at the far side of the pond. I proceeded to pick up the frog, pet it, but when i went to set it down the other turtle lunged out of the water and ate the frog. At this point i tried to get the frog back and after a few moments of struggle pulled it back out. The whole time the croc just sat over in the pond.. non aggressive but not friendly. I then awoke feeling as energized as I've ever been. I always feel groggy when I get up but this was different. I did research and here is what I get out of the dream due to some animal representations. I found the turtle can have different meanings, one is basically "protect mother Earth and she will protect", which brings me back to me helping out the sparrow the day before. The other meaning for turtle is basically that you need to come out of your shell. Frog represents transformation, specifically when it's being eaten. ( which came as a complete shock to me due to the fact of this was well know or something and it happened in my dream) but the other turtle ate it.. so I need to transform and come out of my shell? Also.. the crocodile represents you needing to show your true feelings more. All of this seems to fit perfect for me. I am a very shy and reserved guy. After I learned all this. I had a feeling of complete bliss, maybe even ecstasy for the next day. The next two dreams weren't as in depth but I woke from them with the same feeling of realization and rejuvenation. The second dream was basically me coming home.. I don't know from where but halfway home I ditched my car and began to walk because I noticed the mass amount of deer and cats crowding around me. They followed me all the way home. It's my understanding that both of these animals show some representation of the link between the spirit world and our world and that they're two parts of the same whole. My last dream scares me a little. It was my last dream of the sort and it's been months now. I awoke in a canyon surrounded dessert with plants scattered here and there. Like i was in the wild west or something. I came across a beautiful and wild tan horse. I walked up to it and began to pet it. Then a man appeared. Everything was very vivid in these dreams except this man. He was standing right beside me yet I don't know what he looks like. He let off this feeling of great wisdom and power though. And his booming voice only reinstated this aura. He told me I needed to tame the horse and began to tell me the steps to do so. I was wrestling around with this horse for what seemed like hours until finally he yelled and told me to stop. I got this feeling from the horse that it was getting angry and wasn't going to put up with me much longer. I knew the horse could stomp me if it wanted to and I obeyed what the man told me to do. I backed off and watched as the man went up to the horse and calmed it down. This was the end of my last dream. Does this mean I was doing something wrong? That maybe my spirit guide(s) deemed me not ready for them to continue to come to me for now? What do you make of this dream, or any of these three for that matter? Do you seem to have the ability to feel what others are feeling.. more than most people do? I seem to be able to tap in to people's and animal's emotions well, especially since I met the Sparrow. Also... It seems farfetched but I read that "Shaman's" have healing abilities. I don't think I'm anything special, I'm just one of the few people that decide to listen to their environment but do you think that this shamanistic healing is possible? Maybe I did this with the Sparrow unknowingly? Any inform


Answer:
Young warrior, stick to the word of God as it is written in the Holy Bible to understand this is only a dream.. A shaman cannot predict anything, neither can a psychic, this is called playing with strange fire. they will conjure up evil things and take your very soul from you through things that are spiritually dead. God does not smile on that, He is the Lover of your soul and holds it precious. You should too. Now, I can say this, I am not a dream interpreter, but, dreams happen due to different occurrence in our daily lives, it is recall and it can be intelligibly mixed and mastered by the brain to tell a story by combing a series of thoughts, ideas and incidences. This in the desert has no meaning at all, why because the scripture tells us when a man see,, hell he is going to die, you did not see hell. the only thing you can do is pray if you dream of hell you pray for deliverance because only God has power over life and death. Now as for the animal things, maybe you would be more inclined in your studies to be a veternarian, you seem to have a great love of animals. that alligator was only there doing nothing, so he meant nothing. who pulls a frog back to life? it is the order of nature for a frog to be eaten. you see, you are being tempted to do something other than trust in God here, and fear is a tactic of satan, let it go. You will dream again and you will question it again, but If there is a message that you should have, God will give you vision. Seek ye first the Kingdom of Heaven and all else shall be added unto you. Avoid necromancing and preserve your precious soul for God.

Environmentalists! I need your wisdom!?
Question:
Hey I need your help! So I am currently doing a debate about why this wetland site should be protected. I need to get together lots of reasons why this site would be beneficial to preserve. I am not the best at this and figured that there would be a lot of environmentalists out there that would have better insight...If you're feeling up to it - through me some of your knowledge! Thanks! The information about the site is listed below... This large marsh has remained little changed, surrounded to a large part by pasture lands. Agriculture has been restricted to the north end of the marsh while there is a similar marsh with a rich community protected by the Nature Conservancy (greenwood swamp). Various other marsh preserves are located further east, together forming a large complex. A new highway will be constructed through the middle of the site within the next six months. This cannot be stopped, but if the site is protected, extensive mitigation measures will be incorporated into the road construction to prevent run-off, car-proff crossings for turtles, etc. Traffic volume on the current highway is increasing. When it was built, little attention was paid to its effects on the marsh. A paper recylcing plant is planed on a parcel of land to the south along the highway. The paper plant will require a signficant water source. A local well appears to be the most cost-effective option. The majority of the marsh is classified as Southern Sedge Meadow, dominated by tussock sedge and Canada bluejoint grass. Addictional sedges are Carex diandra and C. sartwellii, marsh bellflower, marsh wild-timothy, water horehound, swamp aster, spotted Joe-Pye weed, marsh fern, and swamp milkweed are also very common. Much of the perimeter of teh sedge meadow is Shrub Carr, dominated by red-osier dogwood, silky dogwood, meadowsweet, and various willows. There are three patches of Oak opening forest on the higher ground within this property. The primary tree is mature Bur oak and Shagbark hickory. American hazelnut is common in the understory. The herb layer is native grasses and forbs present. There are several patches in the marsh forming "islands" of Cottonwood, American and Slippery elm. There is a farily large colony of nesting Great Blue Heron on one of these islands.


Answer:
Start with how many communities and industries in the area use well water. The water gets into the ground in places like the wetlands

Opinions of my story beginning?
Question:
The music thudded from the speakers and I watched intently as everybody danced happily, grinning and laughing and hugging each other. Not that I didn't enjoy doing that, but today something was amiss. Something felt different, like I should keep my senses alert. All day Sammy had been telling me to calm down; that nothing would happen. But she wouldn't know, she's not like me. "Amy, just drop it." Sammy whined as she sat on the log next to me, cradling her head in her hands as she stared dreamily at Fabian who joined the cue to buy her a couple more of whatever clearly strong alcohol he had given her. She looked beautiful in a chalk white dress which ended just past the knees, it was strapless and hugged her curves perfectly. Her oval, blue eyes flickered back to the fire which danced through the air and engulfed everybody in a warm embrace. The sun was just reaching the end of it's journey for one day, and darkness started to creep along the sky. Sammy grinned as Fabian returned back to us and handed her a drink and me another. I placed it down next to me and shrugged as he gave me a questioning look. "Not drinking?" He asked, sitting down next to Sammy and giving her a quick peck on the lips. I shook my head and watched as he looked at Sammy, as if asking for an answer. "She thinks something creepy is gonna' happen today," I glared at her. "but I told her it's nothing. Nothing bad is gonna' happen in this town, is it?" Fabian chuckled and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her towards him. A grimace crept along my face and I looked away awkwardly, glancing around at the place in the middle of the woods. It was ridiculous to be out here. But I guess what Sammy said is right, nothing bad is going to happen when we're surrounded by people. "I'm gonna' go get some...Fresh air." I lied, because I had plenty of that around me. But I wanted to get out of this place, just for a little while. All this partying around me had made me feel dizzy. Sammy didn't reply, to engrossed in something I felt even more sick to look at. I stood, and the dried grass crunched underneath my feet as I made my way into the trees. Crows perched on the branches, beady eyes piercing my skin as they often croaked sharply. Everything else was silence. I pushed away the fear eating away at my mind, screaming at me to go back, and carried on forward. No way was I going back there, not with that nausea tightening my stomach with every second I stayed. I wasn't surprised to see a few couples in the forest, to get some privacy. My lip curled up in disgust and I picked up my pace until I was certain nobody was around. Sighing against an old oak tree, I glanced up at the sky, now lapsed in blackness. It was all so peaceful, the sounds of the music and chatter finally fading into the distance. I knew I shouldn't have come, and maybe if I tried to persuade her, Sammy wouldn't either. Parties were something we both loved, but not tonight, A scream pierced the air, and my senses jolted awake. I ran back to the campfire, more cries of pain echoing into the night. I sprinted through a break in the trees, barely gasping at the scene before me. Everything was frantic, and I couldn't find Sammy. People were swarming around the place, running into the depths of the forest to find their cars and get the hell out of there. Confusion swept over me. What on Earth was going on? I spotted Sammy in the crowd, without Fabian for once. I dodged around people and eventually came to a stop in front of her. "What's going on, Sammy?" I demanded, noticing her face become a unusual pallor. She ushered me along, grabbing on to my wrist, her eyes flitting around the place. She said something inaudible and I had to ask her to repeat herself. She glanced back at me. "They're here, Amy."


Answer:
I think its a great beginning :)... U have great ideas everything its correct n the details well u gave a great description of everything it was almost like I was there ;) keep doing a great job.... :) I loved it

will someone help/explain how to solve this?!?
Question:
1. Find x+y, if: 5x+8y=67 and 2x-y=31 98 46 21 14 7 2. Peter's salary is twice Ann's salary and half of David's salary. Then the average salary of Ann and David is Peter's salary. smaller than equal to larger than depends on salary there is no correct answer Ann and Kate have 80 dollars together. If Kate buys ice-cream for 5 dollars, then Kate will have double Ann's money. How much money does Ann have? $20 $25 $40 $50 $55 3.Given: a=b+2c, b=3c. What is the average of numbers a, b and c? c 1.5c 2c 2 1/3 c 3c 4.In a forest 4/7 of all the trees are conifer and the rest are leaf-bearing. Among the leaf-bearing trees 7/15 are oak and 2/3 of these oaks are new. There are 160 old oaks in the forest. How many trees in all are in the forest? 2400 2800 3200 3600 4000 5.Find x+y, if: 2x+3y=8 and 3x+5y=13 1.5 2 2.5 3 3.5 6.The speed of one car is 20% less than the speed of a second car. How many per cent more time does the first car need to travel the same route as the second car? 12.5% 20% 25% 30% 33 %


Answer:


Does anyone like the start of my story? Please I need opinions.?
Question:
Here it is I casually glimpsed up at the neutrally tinted clouds that hovered above me with darkness and depression as I walked away from the bus stop. School had ended for today, and each step that i took meant I was one step closer to getting home. For right now that's all i could think about. Home. The shelter and protection that kept me away from the dangers and darkness of the world. Home. As I walked past house's and cars, approaching the dirt trail that lead to my house, a sudden obscure feeling went through my whole body. It was a strange feeling. I stopped in the middle of the road and stood there. It was like fear struck me, but I could not understand why. I could feel a shiver run down my spine and my palms began to sweat. My heart started to race at a fast pace. As I thought over this I wasn't aware of the headlights from the distance. While I still stood in the middle of the road, a vecile was approaching me at 80 km an hour. Suddenly,the light of the headlights shown in my eyes and I saw a car approaching me at great speed. Frightened like a deer in headlights, i jumped out of the way. While I jumped, the car swurved against the road a few times as dirt, smoke and the smell of burned rubber filled my lungs. I flew from the jump and hit the ground with a hard impact against my body. My back pack flew off my arms and landed in front of me. My body ached. I had aimed for the grass near the trail, but hit the side of the road instead. I had fallen against gravile, stones, and broken glass from the drunk that lived by and I rolled till I came to a complete stop. Injured, I picked my self up. I brushed off the stones and looked down at my jeans. They were ripped and torn in many different place's. Piece's of glass were stuck in my flesh as blood trickled down from my opened cuts. My black t-shirt was also ripped in many different places and my shoe had flown off. What was mother and father going to say? I asked myself. As I stood, looking at all my wounds, all of a sudden I heard the car, that had almost run me over, come to a complete stop. I heard the engine's turn off and car doors opening. Alarmed, I limped over to my bag and picked it up with my scratched up hands. I slunged it over my shoulder. The pain increased from the weight of the bag on my shoulder, but i knew I had to carry it one way or another. I was in trouble. Deep trouble. And I had to get out of here as fast as I could. My heart was pounding rapidly and I was breathing very heavily. My head began to spin. While footsteps echoed in my eardrums behind me, I started to jog. The sevre pain coming from my leg while I jogged did not help but I had no choice. I jogged and jogged. I jogged to the dirt trail and I kept on jogging in it. I kept jogging till I couldn't see the entrance to the trail, or any echoe of footsteps. I jogged till I was completely alone. I stopped. I dropped my bag on the ground. Dust slowly spiraled from the impact of the bag against the dirt and slowly disappeared in the wind. I looked around. The dirt trail was in a forest and I was surrounded by tall oak trees that hid the sky. The forest was huge. It was made up of hundreds of trees and there were many trails on the dirt trail. Some lead to homes, some lead to streets. Over all the dirt trail that was connected with the forest and many other trails was large. I leaned over and placed my hands on my thighs while I took a breath. I was exausted, tired, and in pain. I closed my eyes and took a few more breaths as I tried to calm my self down from what just happened. Thoughts and emotions raced through my head. The question that I had asked in my thoughts still was repeating inside my head over and over again as I kept my face to the direction of the ground, What was mother and father going to say? I calmed down. I felt my chest. My heart started to beat normally again. As I came up from my crunched down position, I suddenly froze. Unexcpectidly, a faint fog had begun and standing infornt of me was a dark figure. I gasped. Was this one of the people from the car accident? I thought. Panicked, I started to back away , not realizing a small pot hole behind me. I fell into the pot hole with my bad leg and fell backwards. I hit the ground once again, with a hard impact against the back of my head. Oww! I cried in my thoughts. I rubbed the back of my head with my hand as I slowly looked up from the ground.I Iooked up and I could see the figure more clearly. It was a guy. His hand was reached out ,from where he stood, towards me as he stared at me with his deep, blue eyes. "Here..." The guy said. "Take my hand." The words echoed through my head till I realized what he had asked. I reached out my soar arm to his delicate, soft hands. He grabbed hold of me and pulled me up. He pulled me up so fast I didn't even realize that I had left the dirt ground. I was now face to face with him. He smiled and put his hand on my arm. His hand sat there for a few m There will be a part 2!


Answer:
Well in my opinion it was really good.When you cut it off I was so sad I want more,you now have me begin for more.That was a great job!I think you could have a future as a writer.I hope I helped you and good luck writing! Love,Ashton T

10 POINTS HARSHEST CRITICISM!?
Question:
Well, I wrote a first draft of this, I hated it, so I went back and edited.. I still don't think I like it. COME ON GIVE ME EVERYTHING YOU GOT! I CAN TAKE IT! bring it. :-) Also, if you get bored with it, tell me roughly where you stopped reading and what you thought. THANK YOU! Eight years later, a sixteen year old boy woke up on cold coarse pavement. He was known as Aaron Leight. Around him Aaron noticed skid marks of cars that had swerved out of his way. He wondered how one of them didn’t kill him. By some miracle, or possibly a tragedy, he had lived through a night asleep in the middle of a road. He felt a gust of wind whip his skin, chilling every inch of his body, making him realize he was not clothed. He shivered and sat up to look around, hoping somewhere around the area his clothes would lay. The area that surrounded him was too unfamiliar though. He could not place where he was, nor was he sure he had ever seen it. How he got there was a mystery to him, and the fact he was naked frightened him. Aaron stayed in the road, afraid to get up and be seen in so much detail until he found his clothes, but they were nowhere to be seen. On one side of him were a row of old broken down houses. Ones that reminded him of the haunted houses he had seen on television and in movies. The houses seemed eerie to him, and his intuition told him to stay away from them. On the other side of him was a church, which in all its glory did not seem to have even the slightest flaw. The sun chose to shine its light on the church, leaving the row of seemingly abandoned houses in the shadows. Aaron could almost feel the churches boasted glory, and it seemed corrupt to him. Aaron wished to leave the road, but was torn on which side he should take. Behind the church sat a forest however, which stood out much more vividly than the usual forest that filled in the background of a town or village. Aaron could feel it calling to him, although his gut twisted in response. In the back of his head, Aaron felt something wrong, he knew deep down inside him he should not enter the forest, but something overcame him and he became a puppet to the unstoppable force telling him to go. He stood up quickly, now feeling as if he were in a trance and could no longer control his motions. He stepped quickly off the road, and when his feet hit the grass, he ran. The ounce of conscious mind he had left kept telling him to go back, but he kept running. He could feel hands trying to pull him back, but he ignored them, and ran straight through them. When he reached the forest, he stopped running and stood behind a sturdy oak tree to catch his breath. He suddenly felt in control again, and knew deep down, he needed to get out. His curiosity told him differently though. The forest felt strange to him, and he wanted to know why. Suddenly, Aaron heard leaves crunch under light footsteps, and looked up in surprise. He was shocked at what he saw.


Answer:
It seems like you're trying to get Aaron somewhere, and to build a bit of tension and suspense while doing it. Meandering description will not do that for you; everything is written is such a roundabout way. so Aaron was was puzzled and frightened at waking up naked in a strange place. You don't necessarily have to TELL us that. Notice how people who SAY they're frightened usually aren't trembling in the last stages of fear. Now if Aaron were really frightened, his actions would be less calm, and he would have less time to notice things in a roundabout way. Just say things directly! Furthermore, when people are confused and frightened, they don't notice, let alone ANALYZE, small details, such as the "glory" of the church (which I will address later in all my harsh glory). No...people who have lost their calm notice SENSORY things first, act impulsively, and contemplate things LATER when they've calmed down! Furthermore, when Aaron is being controlled by some higher force, you don't manage to show us the extent of his mental conflict. I read what you wrote, and I think "Oh...no big deal. The writing is so calm that he's bound to be okay." You might inject some body motions here--actual actions, not just descriptions of what Aaron was doing. For example... he grunted with mental exertion, he felt a drugged numbness through his mind, his ounce of remaining consciousness sent out feeble jerks through his spine...etc. etc. etc. At any rate, Aaron is ALARMED, ergo, make him DO something (or at least SHOW what is restraining him, rather than telling us), make him feel URGENT. And now I will harshly address the "glorious" church. What is with that entire paragraph? If Aaron weren't so caught up in his surroundings (and not in the darting nervous way that confused and frightened people are apt to be. No...Aaron observes with the calmness of Sherlocke Holmes. But I've already ranted about that, so on with the church...). Anyway, as I was saying before that long parenthetical insertion (lol), the description of the church is way too long. One would predict that the church will be important in the immediate future, but NO, Aaron ends up running toward the FOREST behind the church, and NOT the church itself. Even if you're trying to disarm readers into thinking that the setting is harmless, you don't need to describe the church in such distracting detail. Also, please do not use "glorious" as a label for a church. Yes, some churches are glorious. They are gloriously pious, they are gloriously opulent, they are gloriously learned. They are not JUST glorious. "Glorious" by itself has so many different potential meanings that it has become practically empty. Harsh technical issues: 1. What do you mean by "Eight years later"? Please specify whether this is an excerpt from a larger story, or whether this is all that you have. "Eight years later" is a poor way to start a story. 2. Do we REALLY have to know that his name is Aaron Leight? What relevance does it have to the story? None whatsoever. The name Leight has nothing to do with why Aaron woke up where he did, or why he ran into the forest (at least, you have given it no significance in this excerpt). In fact, don't even bother writing "He was known as..." Just use the name Aaron, and we'll know who you're talking about. 3. Cliche, overused, canned, and awkward phrases! a) "chilling every inch of his body" b) "Ones that reminded him of the haunted houses he had seen on television and in movies." note on this one...You compare those houses to the ones on TV and in movies, and we'll conjure up parodies in our minds. Do you really want to risk that? c) "in all its glory did not seem to have even the slightest flaw" d) "The sun chose to shine its light on the church" ... No. The sun CHOOSES nothing. Unless you capitalize "sun" and give it deity status, the sun does not make decisions! Furthermore, the sun shines on everything. What makes the church so unique? You can say stuff like "the sunlight seemed to concentrate around the church in a halo," or even "In its glow, it SEEMED TO AARON as if the sun had chosen to FAVOR the church with its rays" e) "he became a puppet to the unstoppable force telling him to go" --So Marney...what happened this weekend? Why'd you start acting like that? --Oh, ya know. I became puppet to an unstoppable force that tole me to just go, go, go. --Erm...Marney, you sure you're feeling okay? Tell me what really happened. --Fine, fine. I lost control of my body. It's as if some force was inhibiting my brain, and I couldn't stop my muscles from moving forward. I felt like I was paralyzed, and didn't realize till later that my limbs were actually jerking on their own. --Much better. Much, much better than your previous EXPLANATION OF DOOM. (note: explanations of doom are ominous phrases that can pretty much mean anything.) f) "ounce of conscious mind" --> I believe the phrase should be "ounce of consciousness", if consciousness should even be compared to things measured in ounces. g) "His curiosity told him differently though" Curiosity is a state of mind. People HAVE curiosity, and they have it in QUANTITIES; it isn't some little fixture in the brain whispering questions. It can MAKE people do things, but it can't TELL people to do things. Actually, the little fixture in the brain might even work, but only if you take the time to describe it. Otherwise, this phrase is awkward. h) "The forest felt strange to him, and he wanted to know why." Oh my, have we gone back to elementary school writing workshop? i) "He could feel hands trying to pull him back" Is this a magic forest? Is this a beast- or human- or ghost- infested forested. To my knowledge, it could be any of those, or even all three, but I wouldn't know since you don't specify. Please elaborate a bit about the hands. It's such a sudden development, and so quickly brushed aside. And here ends my unnecessarily harsh critique. I'll give you cyber tissues if you need them :P Your writing isn't as bad as a lot of stuff I've read on here, but note that you asked us to be DELIBERATELY harsh. Therefore, I omitted any neutral (and some semi-positive) comments that I had.

How is my story, its a little long.?
Question:
Ok I know it isn't perfect; I wrote it in early fifth grade but here it is: The dark clouds bellowed as I walked home. The wind was picking up, so I zipped up my coat even higher. It was early fall; reddening trees hanging over my head. I was walking down the sidewalk up to my house at the end of the street. I walked into the door of my house. I yelled upstairs to my mom, "Mom, I'm going outside!" She yelled back to me, "Be back by 6:00! Bye, honey!" "Bye, Mom!" I stepped into the closet for a second to grab my poncho, scarf, and gloves. Pulling my poncho over my coat and slipping my scarf and gloves on, I stepped out the door. Staring at the blackening sky, I picked up my speed. As I walked, no cars passed by. When I had made it there, my eyes glanced all around the forest to make sure no one was there. Searching for my hidden path, I stepped over the fallen branches and wet leaves. 'There it is!', I thought, looking up through the trees to hidden home. You see, my father had built this tree house for me before he disappeared. I climbed up the old rope ladder into my wondrous hide-out. I took the broom out from behind the door and started sweeping out the leaves through the door way, so they gently floated to the forest floor. Then I closed the door. I closed the windows facing large oak trees to keep out the harsh, cold, wind. Looking around my little dwelling, I couldn't help but think that this place could really bless my existence. I barely appeared against the landscape of 7th grade, which I called the 7th World. Being a loner, the only friend I had was myself and the house, of course. After straightening up the furniture, I sat down in my little, cushioned, purple chair and I gazed around. My dad just knew everything that would make the perfect dwelling. He had built: a simple sofa chair, a little table next to it, two shelves filled with novels of his past, and the picture of me as a baby, him, and my real mother. Yes, it's a sudden surprise; I’m adopted. You see, my real mother was a lady named Libby. My dad's name was Justice. She died in a fatal explosion at a hospital when I was 6. My father mysteriously disappeared during thunder storm. I looked at my watch; 5:57 pm. 'Lost in my memories again,' I thought. Opening up the door, I took one more glance at the place, and then started for the ladder. Stepping onto the first step, and then the second, I took my hands off the ladder. Planning to take one more step, I lost my balance and tumbled into space. Everything was turning from blue to red. Black shapes were appearing more and more through the red smoke. The blue was almost fading into the horrific "sky", and I felt a hand grab my hand. I looked up; a small face with twinkling blue eyes stared down at me and then past me to the little black creatures growing bigger and bigger as they came closer and closer. She said, "Hold tight, we’re in for a bumpy ride!" She looked up to the shrinking blue and flew towards it; me dangling from one of her arms. I couldn't believe it! She had the wings of an angel! She picked up speed as we flew higher and higher and the black creatures were growing smaller and smaller. All of a sudden we passed all the red smoke. We were surrounded by blue. The angel said, "Hi, I'm Haruko, you must be Bina!" "Yes, I am, hi!", I said back. She smiled, "Tell me about you." About to let go of me, I screamed, "No, I can't fly like you! " "Oh right, silly me! Here eat this!", she said. She tossed me a fluffy cookie the size of my palm. I ate it, and then felt very weird. "Why am i feeling tinglyness in my back?!", I asked anxiously. "You'll see!", she said. All of a sudden, there was some weight on my back. I turned my neck around and saw shiny, white wings! "Oh my gosh! Wings! I have wings!", I yelled with happiness. Haruko shook her head with a grin. It was so easy to move them! And when she let go of me, they started flapping ever so subtly, keeping me floating with ease. "Now let me tell you all you need to know.", she said. We started flying towards a tiny white shape in the distance. Haruko pointed to it and said, "That’s where we’re going. It’s called the White Kingdom. But I really don't know why. That’s where King Justice and Queen Libby live! They’ve been expecting you." "Haruko, what was that place back there?", I asked, quickly looking behind me. "Oh..."-she shuddered,-"I would of known you'd ask that. That place was called the Black Kingdom. It's ruled by Princess Abha, Princess Kimberly, and Princess Isahanna. That was the portal to the Red Lands from Earth. If I hadn't of saved you, their minions would of captured you and the sisters would of killed you...", she said. I looked at her, "Why would they want to kill me?" "Bina, this might be a little sudden, but... Your mother back on Earth, was their mother. She told them all about you, before they murdered her.", she said. I was the one who shuddered this time. "Y-you mean...?", I stuttered. "Yes. They want to kill you. I'm so sorry. But here in the White Kingdom, you will be heavily guarded. My husband, Druce, is in on your safety also", she smiled wistfully. We continued our journey until I could see the cloud up close. It was a castle! "Here we are, the White Castle!, Haruko said. Inside the gates was a village. Tons of angels were buzzing around; some carrying fruit and other objects, and children hopping jumping around through lots of floating feet. Thanks everyone! :D


Answer:
I like, it could use a little work, but it's still good. keep writing =D plus, if you wrote this in 5th grade, that means you are verrry talented and will probably become a wonderful writer when you grow up, just don't give up